deerly beloved;

[driving]

deerlyBeloved: hargrove Are you into the concept of a threesome without the inconvenience of trying to fit three people into a bed? Well, you're in luck, because here we have two minds for the price of one body! One of them's a complete monster and the other one's the Mind Flayer. The bad news is that neither of them are willing to get a haircut, but if you can look beyond the mullet you're in for a truly wild night.

( billy hargrove | 18 | m | bisexual )

Comments

un: SuperheroFangirl

[variantcover]

what if i wanna?
what if i'm into guys with mullets.

nice mullet btw. are you bringing it back in fashion or are you from a time where mullets are still ok to have?

[driving]

yeah that's right don't let this app tell you what to do

i'm always in fashion but i'm from 1985 if that answers your question

[variantcover]

cool. that's 12 years before i was born.

[driving]

wait are you telling me that mullets aren't cool in the future??

[variantcover]

mullets are definitely not cool in the future.
they're among the top three worst haircuts to have...
right next to bowl cuts and combovers.

[driving]

what
what the fuck
that's terrible


well i'm bringing them back. people in the future clearly just don't know how to wear them right.

[variantcover]

hey, you do you.
i can't tell you how many people have told me my pink ombre was tacky.
mostly teachers and relatives, but whatever, fuck em.

un: simba

[sinnabon]

That doesn't seem like a good way to find people to have sex with you.
That's what Steve said this app is for.
I think Steve's confused.

[driving]

i didn't write it
i guess someone here doesn't think i'm boyfriend material
that's okay though i don't need this stupid app to get laid

[sinnabon]

They seem to think that about a lot of people here.
Mine says to leave me alone.
Were you dating someone at home, before Deerington?

[driving]

not really dating
had a bunch of people i hooked up with

[ That means a bunch of people who thought he was going to date them but that he dumped after a week or two because he's afraid of commitment. Thus, 'don't' is probably the best advice anyone can give about dating him. He's a gross playboy and a heartbreaker, not boyfriend material. ]

[sinnabon]

Why not?
Did no one want to date you?

[driving]

everybody wanted to date me
i just don't like to settle down

un: harrington. The evening after de-ghosting the sewers

[acidwashjeans]

[ Steve is drunk to the point that he hasn't realised this is the dating app and not the normal messaging app. ]

HEY 🍆

🍆HEAD

ANSWER YOUR PHONE

[ and here he is calling your phone you better answer ]

[driving]

why

[ but fine he's answering it ]

[acidwashjeans]

[ he meant it to be video, but it's voice because what is controlling your phone. ]

Hey. Hey. I gotta talk to you and I don't know where you live okay so I gotta call you to do it.

[ Someone has been drinking ]

[driving]

[ Okay. He's obviously drunk. But Billy's not going to hang up on him. ]

What is it, Harrington?

[acidwashjeans]

[ This is a good start, no hanging up.]

I-- I fucked up, okay. It's my fault all this-- shit happened and you got caught up in it. And-- it's shit, man. It's really shit.

[ Steve's been sitting on this for an hour or so. He'd wanted to apologise properly but hadn't been brave enough to to do it, so he got drunk. And now he's here.

And there's a lot to say. Sorry Billy if you want to say anything he's going to ramble a bit.]

Like I get it. I'm an idiot and I rush into stuff without thinking and I just keep thinking that you're sick of people bullshitting you and fucking around and I don't want you to think I'm trying to mess up your life or something, okay? You've got this tough guy thing going on and you don't give a shit but I ate you, dude. That's so messed up. That's messed up on so many levels and I'm trying to apologise because it just makes me feel so sick-- having to go down there today with Jack and fix it-- make the ghosts go away but that doesn't make it better or right.

[ At this point he realises he doesn't have anywhere to land this journey he's going on ]

Okay so. I'm sorry, okay? I guess that's what I'm trying to say. I'm sorry.

[driving]

[ He pauses for a long while, trying to process what he just heard. ]

You're drunk. [ But he can't just hang up on that no matter how much he wants to. ] It wasn't you.

I could tell it wasn't you. When I was dying down there I knew that you were dying, too. Or already dead. [ He exhales sharply. ] I know you'd never want to do anything like that and having that choice taken away is some awful shit.

[ He does feel sad for Steve, and that just makes it even worse. He's out here feeling bad for his goddamn enemy now? But of all the people Billy knew from back home, Steve's the one he had the most positive connection with.

And given that he punched him in the face multiple times that's really pathetic on his part. ] You don't have to keep doing this for me. You don't owe me anything. I've hurt you and most of your friends.

[ And he doesn't apologize for it, but he acknowledges it at least. It's just starting to feel weird that Steve keeps reaching out to him like this despite everything. It seems weird that they're almost friends. ]

UN: harrington

[acidwashjeans]

[ why is steve checking people's deerly beloveds? why is he checking billy's? why not just cross the hall and talk to him in person instead of lying in bed and texting???
it's a mystery. ]

i think i liked it better when it was just 'dont'

[driving]

[ This is actually the first time Billy’s seen it, too. Good thing this is texting so he can pretend not to care. ]

me too
i get it, i’m never getting laid again, ha ha how hilarious
ha

[ Even over text he still sucks at pretending not to care. ]

[acidwashjeans]

[ well

that's a total downer, thanks billy ]

like anyone has time for that with monster town throwing curve balls at us every second day

[driving]

i know
but god it'd be a nice fucking break from all this mess



anyways i liked 'don't' better too because 'i'm the guy deerington told you not to fuck' would probably actually work on someone

[acidwashjeans]

no one's that dumb

[ exactly one person is that dumb ]


i still think mine's worse than yours

[driving]

yeah, yours is pretty bad
you don't even like watching movies