Are you into the concept of a threesome without the inconvenience of trying to fit three people into a bed? Well, you're in luck, because here we have two minds for the price of one body! One of them's a complete monster and the other one's the Mind Flayer. The bad news is that neither of them are willing to get a haircut, but if you can look beyond the mullet you're in for a truly wild night.
I-- I fucked up, okay. It's my fault all this-- shit happened and you got caught up in it. And-- it's shit, man. It's really shit.
[ Steve's been sitting on this for an hour or so. He'd wanted to apologise properly but hadn't been brave enough to to do it, so he got drunk. And now he's here.
And there's a lot to say. Sorry Billy if you want to say anything he's going to ramble a bit.]
Like I get it. I'm an idiot and I rush into stuff without thinking and I just keep thinking that you're sick of people bullshitting you and fucking around and I don't want you to think I'm trying to mess up your life or something, okay? You've got this tough guy thing going on and you don't give a shit but I ate you, dude. That's so messed up. That's messed up on so many levels and I'm trying to apologise because it just makes me feel so sick-- having to go down there today with Jack and fix it-- make the ghosts go away but that doesn't make it better or right.
[ At this point he realises he doesn't have anywhere to land this journey he's going on ]
Okay so. I'm sorry, okay? I guess that's what I'm trying to say. I'm sorry.
[ He pauses for a long while, trying to process what he just heard. ]
You're drunk. [ But he can't just hang up on that no matter how much he wants to. ] It wasn't you.
I could tell it wasn't you. When I was dying down there I knew that you were dying, too. Or already dead. [ He exhales sharply. ] I know you'd never want to do anything like that and having that choice taken away is some awful shit.
[ He does feel sad for Steve, and that just makes it even worse. He's out here feeling bad for his goddamn enemy now? But of all the people Billy knew from back home, Steve's the one he had the most positive connection with.
And given that he punched him in the face multiple times that's really pathetic on his part. ] You don't have to keep doing this for me. You don't owe me anything. I've hurt you and most of your friends.
[ And he doesn't apologize for it, but he acknowledges it at least. It's just starting to feel weird that Steve keeps reaching out to him like this despite everything. It seems weird that they're almost friends. ]
God, you don't get it, I'm not doing this because I owe you shit. I'm doing this because I fucked up and I can't just pretend like I didn't.
[ Steve doesn't cry. Even with all this beer in him that isn't going to change, but he feels like shit right now and he isn't in control of himself like he usually is. His voice is wavering all over the place.
Because part of him feels sorry for Billy. He'd seen him cry and spit up blood, and get freaked out by things. But most of him feels a giant mess of confusion and the alcohol has made it clear that whatever else, he feels bad about what he did and he wants Billy to know it.]
You think you-- that I don't know you almost ran over the kids? Dustin told me about it. And you beat the absolute shit out of me because-- [ actually he still isn't sure. ] I don't even know why! But-- that's not--
[ not the point? What even is the point. ] I don't care if you're an asshole, dickhead. I'm trying not to be one so I'm apologising and looking out for you because you're from Hawkins too and that's what I gotta do.
I'm from San Diego, Harrington. [ It's not even that he just doesn't want to admit to being from Hawkins right now, it's that he doesn't want to have Steve looking after him just because they share some arbitrary geographic location. ]
You don't have to look after me because I lived in your shitty town for a few months. And I know you're gonna say some shit about how you don't have to but you want to - but I don't even know why you want to.
Look, I don't blame you for what happened in the sewers, so I accept your apology or whatever. But I don't want you looking out for me just because I lived in Hawkins for a few months.
[ That leaves room open for 'I'm okay with you looking out for me if you have other reasons, too', and it's not entirely on purpose but it isn't a lie. ]
[ Steve's drunk brain filters out you don't have to look after me] Why are you--
[ and honestly???? no steve is here and he is being a good person to his crush and he's not making it weird so Billy is just going to have to shut up and take it ]
Look, tough guy. The world is shitty and lets you down all the time. I get it, okay? Sure, my mom didn't up and leave me in California but shit happens to everyone. So if I want to make the world even a little less shitty for the people I care about like you and Wheeler then I'm-- gonna do that. So suck it up, Hargrove.
[ and that, steve's drunk brain tells himself, has solved all his problems. A+ good job, steve ]
You don't care about me. [ There's no hurt in his voice when he says that, it's just stated flat like it's a simple fact. ]
You care about home and about being a better person and because of that, even though I'm the last person from Hawkins you wanted to see here, you're going to look out for me. But you don't care about me, and hell, you shouldn't.
[ Because, and he doesn't know how many times he needs to repeat this, he beat the shit out of you.
He pauses for a few seconds, the next question on the tip of his tongue. He shouldn't ask something like this. He should be content to say his piece and hang up. And yet... ] Am I wrong?
[ somehow all the problems were not solved. who could have forseen this??? ]
Wha- are you still gonna be a dick about this? You are such a douchebag, okay? The second biggest douchebag I know. Maybe even more of a douchebag than Tommy H. Astronomical levels of douchebag. [ this is why you should only apologise when there are monsters around to move things along after the apology has occured.
wait, focus. answer the question. ] Of course you're wrong.
[ ...Okay. He wasn't actually expecting to hear that. ]
You make a habit of caring about people who've been nothing but assholes to you, Harrington?
[ And he isn't even trying to continue being an asshole, even though he kind of is. He's just honestly baffled as to why someone would care about a person who's been a thorn in their side since the day they met. ]
[ ugh drunk steve cannot understand what is happening. billy why are you doing this????? give him a moment while he opens another can of beer because wow ]
Okay, Harrington- Hargrove. Hargrove. [yup that's your name] You're not the great big dickbag you think you are. You beat me up like one whole time while we've been here. And you helped me fight those dream monsters, and we hung out at the beach, and we figured out about eggplant dicks [ you can't see, but he's counting these off on his fingers ]
and you still have to play blindfolded basketball against me which you're going to lose because you are not the hot hot at basketball you think you are. So yeah, eggplantface, you figure out why I'm apologising to you okay.
[ there's a beep and the video turns on. shit, he'd meant to hang up. ]
[ And some of the other people he's hurt have been kids. Almost none of them have been people who actually deserve it, because he's afraid of those people. He takes it out on the weaker ones.
He flinches when he hears the beep, and turns to look at the phone expecting that he got hung up on...only to see Steve Harrington's stupid drunk face. He laughs at that, and then re-positions himself so the camera has a better angle on him. ]
And that's worth putting up with the rest of me for? [ An honest question, because some people in his life didn't put up with him even before he turned mean. ]
[ Steve is lying on his roof, because it's the best place to get drunk and when he finishes a can he can try to hit the demogorgon lawn sprinkler that just keeps appearing on his lawn no matter how many times Mike destroys it
He squints at the tiny screen, unable to properly articulate any of the mess of feelings. ]
I don't know, are you planning to drive around town looking for kids to beat up when you're bored?
I hope you're not putting too many of your hopes and dreams into me following the same path as you.
[ He doesn't say 'yes I'm going to drive around town terrifying kids', at least. But he's done it before, and being here hasn't changed him that much. ]
[ The pffffffft noise that Steve makes goes on for a while. Billy? Turning babysitter?? When hell freezes over. ]
Do you just like hearing yourself talk. Is that it? [ Steve you've been doing most of the talking ] Come on, Hargrove. What else is there? [ time for more beer] You afraid I want to cut your hair off while you sleep? Make you babysit Mike? Or hHave you just never had a friend or something? God.
[ He finishes the can of beer ] You are shit at being apologized to, okay? The worst.
Yeah. Hargrove. I'm gunning for you to go join the girl scouts. [ Another pfffft, for effect. And because it's a fun noise to make. ]
And what do you mean it's usually you apologizing? I have literally never seen you apologize to anyone. [ Steve hasn't seen it so it can't be true. #logic ]
Slow down there, I said I owed the apologies, not that I gave them.
[ And most of the people who actually owed him an apology never gave him one, either. Steve might be the first one who actually did, and it was for something that wasn't really his fault. ]
Christ, if you drink too much more you're gonna have to sleep up there. [ Because Billy's not going to come over and carry your dumb ass down so you don't fall, definitely not. ]
I'm more of a self-sufficient guy. [ Which means no, he's never had a friend like that. ]
Yeah, yeah. [ He's fine. Totally fine. Now the worst of it is over and he's apolgised and Billy has accepted the apology-- which he has, right?-- all is good with the world. ]
Self-sufficiently an asshole. [ Which is a hilarious joke, okay. Please laugh. ] That explains why you're shit at taking apologies.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ but fine he's answering it ]
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Hey. Hey. I gotta talk to you and I don't know where you live okay so I gotta call you to do it.
[ Someone has been drinking ]
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What is it, Harrington?
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I-- I fucked up, okay. It's my fault all this-- shit happened and you got caught up in it. And-- it's shit, man. It's really shit.
[ Steve's been sitting on this for an hour or so. He'd wanted to apologise properly but hadn't been brave enough to to do it, so he got drunk. And now he's here.
And there's a lot to say. Sorry Billy if you want to say anything he's going to ramble a bit.]
Like I get it. I'm an idiot and I rush into stuff without thinking and I just keep thinking that you're sick of people bullshitting you and fucking around and I don't want you to think I'm trying to mess up your life or something, okay? You've got this tough guy thing going on and you don't give a shit but I ate you, dude. That's so messed up. That's messed up on so many levels and I'm trying to apologise because it just makes me feel so sick-- having to go down there today with Jack and fix it-- make the ghosts go away but that doesn't make it better or right.
[ At this point he realises he doesn't have anywhere to land this journey he's going on ]
Okay so. I'm sorry, okay? I guess that's what I'm trying to say. I'm sorry.
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You're drunk. [ But he can't just hang up on that no matter how much he wants to. ] It wasn't you.
I could tell it wasn't you. When I was dying down there I knew that you were dying, too. Or already dead. [ He exhales sharply. ] I know you'd never want to do anything like that and having that choice taken away is some awful shit.
[ He does feel sad for Steve, and that just makes it even worse. He's out here feeling bad for his goddamn enemy now? But of all the people Billy knew from back home, Steve's the one he had the most positive connection with.
And given that he punched him in the face multiple times that's really pathetic on his part. ] You don't have to keep doing this for me. You don't owe me anything. I've hurt you and most of your friends.
[ And he doesn't apologize for it, but he acknowledges it at least. It's just starting to feel weird that Steve keeps reaching out to him like this despite everything. It seems weird that they're almost friends. ]
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[ Steve doesn't cry. Even with all this beer in him that isn't going to change, but he feels like shit right now and he isn't in control of himself like he usually is. His voice is wavering all over the place.
Because part of him feels sorry for Billy. He'd seen him cry and spit up blood, and get freaked out by things. But most of him feels a giant mess of confusion and the alcohol has made it clear that whatever else, he feels bad about what he did and he wants Billy to know it.]
You think you-- that I don't know you almost ran over the kids? Dustin told me about it. And you beat the absolute shit out of me because-- [ actually he still isn't sure. ] I don't even know why! But-- that's not--
[ not the point? What even is the point. ] I don't care if you're an asshole, dickhead. I'm trying not to be one so I'm apologising and looking out for you because you're from Hawkins too and that's what I gotta do.
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You don't have to look after me because I lived in your shitty town for a few months. And I know you're gonna say some shit about how you don't have to but you want to - but I don't even know why you want to.
Look, I don't blame you for what happened in the sewers, so I accept your apology or whatever. But I don't want you looking out for me just because I lived in Hawkins for a few months.
[ That leaves room open for 'I'm okay with you looking out for me if you have other reasons, too', and it's not entirely on purpose but it isn't a lie. ]
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[ and honestly???? no steve is here and he is being a good person to his crush and he's not making it weird so Billy is just going to have to shut up and take it ]
Look, tough guy. The world is shitty and lets you down all the time. I get it, okay? Sure, my mom didn't up and leave me in California but shit happens to everyone. So if I want to make the world even a little less shitty for the people I care about like you and Wheeler then I'm-- gonna do that. So suck it up, Hargrove.
[ and that, steve's drunk brain tells himself, has solved all his problems. A+ good job, steve ]
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You care about home and about being a better person and because of that, even though I'm the last person from Hawkins you wanted to see here, you're going to look out for me. But you don't care about me, and hell, you shouldn't.
[ Because, and he doesn't know how many times he needs to repeat this, he beat the shit out of you.
He pauses for a few seconds, the next question on the tip of his tongue. He shouldn't ask something like this. He should be content to say his piece and hang up. And yet... ] Am I wrong?
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Wha- are you still gonna be a dick about this? You are such a douchebag, okay? The second biggest douchebag I know. Maybe even more of a douchebag than Tommy H. Astronomical levels of douchebag. [ this is why you should only apologise when there are monsters around to move things along after the apology has occured.
wait, focus. answer the question. ] Of course you're wrong.
[ is the problem solved now????? ]
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You make a habit of caring about people who've been nothing but assholes to you, Harrington?
[ And he isn't even trying to continue being an asshole, even though he kind of is. He's just honestly baffled as to why someone would care about a person who's been a thorn in their side since the day they met. ]
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Okay, Harrington- Hargrove. Hargrove. [yup that's your name] You're not the great big dickbag you think you are. You beat me up like one whole time while we've been here. And you helped me fight those dream monsters, and we hung out at the beach, and we figured out about eggplant dicks [ you can't see, but he's counting these off on his fingers ]
and you still have to play blindfolded basketball against me which you're going to lose because you are not the hot hot at basketball you think you are. So yeah, eggplantface, you figure out why I'm apologising to you okay.
[ there's a beep and the video turns on. shit, he'd meant to hang up. ]
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[ And some of the other people he's hurt have been kids. Almost none of them have been people who actually deserve it, because he's afraid of those people. He takes it out on the weaker ones.
He flinches when he hears the beep, and turns to look at the phone expecting that he got hung up on...only to see Steve Harrington's stupid drunk face. He laughs at that, and then re-positions himself so the camera has a better angle on him. ]
And that's worth putting up with the rest of me for? [ An honest question, because some people in his life didn't put up with him even before he turned mean. ]
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He squints at the tiny screen, unable to properly articulate any of the mess of feelings. ]
I don't know, are you planning to drive around town looking for kids to beat up when you're bored?
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[ He doesn't say 'yes I'm going to drive around town terrifying kids', at least. But he's done it before, and being here hasn't changed him that much. ]
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Do you just like hearing yourself talk. Is that it? [ Steve you've been doing most of the talking ] Come on, Hargrove. What else is there? [ time for more beer] You afraid I want to cut your hair off while you sleep? Make you babysit Mike? Or hHave you just never had a friend or something? God.
[ He finishes the can of beer ] You are shit at being apologized to, okay? The worst.
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[ Because he's not doing that. Not ever. Nope. ] I'm always the one who owes the apologies. I don't usually get them.
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And what do you mean it's usually you apologizing? I have literally never seen you apologize to anyone. [ Steve hasn't seen it so it can't be true. #logic ]
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[ And most of the people who actually owed him an apology never gave him one, either. Steve might be the first one who actually did, and it was for something that wasn't really his fault. ]
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[ pffffff an apology card from Billy Hargrove ]
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What do you mean, 'have you just never had a friend or something'?
[ Are you saying you're his friend?? ]
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Yeah, you know? Someone who'll get you something from the store and won't immediately tell you how much you owe them.
[ It was a revelation to learn there were such people in the world. ]
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I'm more of a self-sufficient guy. [ Which means no, he's never had a friend like that. ]
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Self-sufficiently an asshole. [ Which is a hilarious joke, okay. Please laugh. ] That explains why you're shit at taking apologies.
[ steve that doesn't explain that at all ]
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[ As if heckling Steve isn't his entire existence. ]
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